The past four weeks have been a blur to me, so much so that I have had to look at my pregnancy ticker a time or two to find out how many weeks along I am. In a way it's been good - to be so busy, I mean. Although, a big part of me feels that this pregnancy is slipping away before I can really enjoy it. Unless the Lord changes my husband's heart - this will be my last pregnancy. He will be 40 this year and feels that 2 children is enough. I tend to agree with him, mostly. This is THE best part of being pregnant. The sweet baby kicking me all the time, my energy level at its peak.... If I were to stay 27 weeks pregnant forever I think I would be ok with that.

My grandmother, Marylou, has occupied most of my time over the past 3 weeks -mentally and physically. She is actually James' grandmother - his step grandmother to be exact, so I suppose this actually makes her my step grandmother-in-law. She IS my other grandmother. No step or in law about it. I love her deeply and would love her no more if she were my own flesh and blood. She married James' grandfather shortly after James' grandmother died - about 30 years or so ago. She embraced the family and in turn, they embraced her. My father's mom died when I was quite young and Honey - my mom's mom, was the only grandmother I had until I met Marylou. I actually knew Marylou before I knew James. I was a waitress at a diner that she and James' grandfather dined at most every Sunday morning after church. They were a kind, well dressed couple who treated me with respect. I would also meet James in this same diner in the future. No match making or anything- it was just good timing that brought James and I together one rainy Sunday in October of 1997. It wasn't until a few weeks after I started dating James that I discovered who his grandparents were.

James' grandfather was diagnosed with lung cancer in December of 1997 and died in August of 1998. Marylou took such good care of him from the time they married to the day he died. Soon after his death, Marylou gave Blossom (their dog) to me because she wanted to travel and felt that Blossom would be happier. This is how I came to have my sweet Brittany, Blossom.

Marylou has been living on her own ever since Jeffie (James' grandfather) died. She sold the house they had in Alabama in 2001 and has lived in her own apartment ever since. She has severe rheumatoid arthritis and has been losing lots of weight over the past 6 months. I feel guilty that I only saw her once in that time - it was in February. We met for lunch along with my mother in law and my mother in law's sister. I was too occupied with Nathan - trying to keep him quiet and well behaved. I failed to notice how thin she had gotten. I saw my mother in law helping her out of the car, holding her arm as she walked, helping her get up, etc. I really didn't SEE these things for how bad off she was. I rationalized them in my brain - she didn't really need all that help. But she did. And she needed much, much more help than anyone realized.

It makes me too sad to go into all the details but the fact of the matter is that she is now in an Acute Care Long Term Hospital. She has a stage 4 pressure ulcer on her sacral area (right above the natural separation of the buttocks - you know, the butt crack) She is unable to take her rheumatoid arthritis medicine because of this severe wound. She is in a great deal of pain - unable to walk or grip anything with her hands.

I am too mad to go into the horrible care that she received at Brookwood Hospital in Birmingham Alabama. She is now at a long term acute care hospital in Birmingham. The care is much better - but not good enough. I am on the phone several times a week with her doctor, or her nurse, or the nursing director (complaining about her care). I am leaving Nathan with my sister in law and physically going to be with her for a day at least every other week. I will do this until I am satisfied that she is getting the care she needs on a regular basis, until other family members are visiting her OFTEN and basically until she doesn't need me.

Marylou taught me how to knit several years ago. I only knit one pattern - the blanket pattern that she taught me. She can't even pick up a knitting needle now. It kills me to see her like this.

Nathan and I just got back from visiting James in New Orleans. I have lots of pictures. All happy ones. That is a good note to end on, I guess.